Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Now then i realised someone's true form, after so long. I think that's kinda hurting and sad. Some people just dunno that the way they phrase a sentence can be so insulting and hurtful, or maybe they did it purposely and they didnt know that it is hurting? i dunno why do i keep defending that is ok to hear all these from these people because is their character but i shall not do that anymore. I used to be the naive little girl who just obeys or just follow people's instructions, but i'm so not going to be one anymore. is getting my nerves that i'm being taken advantage of. Why should i even care about how you feel when you no longer care about how i feel. Why should i still defend u in other people's mindset that you are actually not selfish. Why should i say that you are a nice person when you are not nice anymore. I just see too many fake faces nowadays that it makes me wanna puke. One moment, someone just tell you that the other person was irritating blar blar, next moment they end up chatting happily. So ya, tell me how should i feel? Some say they did so much things, but in fact is nothing much, just trying to be boastful or trying to appear to be weida? i dunno, it beats me. I actually feel sad and cry why people are turning like these. I guess i'm wrong all the while, maybe they are all along like these, just that i didn't realise. How naive i am?
I think is kinda late of me to realise that people ARE SELFISH... IS BY NATURE.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Continued from the previous post, a small miracle did happen to me on 31st Aug.
I received a call from Kelly Services at 5.45pm (a time which I think no agency will call), that my agent arranged an interview for me the next day with AMEX!! It's a position of Foreign exchange Operations support! You couldn't imagine my expression after i received the call- jumping with joy around the house and rejoicing with screams and laughter. IS MY FIRST INTERVIEW!!! My agent sent my resume to Amex without asking me and miraculously they requested to have an interview with me! omg to me!!
So with much anticipation, I woke up the next morning feeling extremely excited for my first interview, I received another call. Second miracle which kinds of clashes with the first one. Recruit Express called me that I was selected as a Contract Bank Officer at Hsbc for 3 months! No need any interview and I can report for work the following Monday, another OMG! But I'm faced with a dilemma whether to accept the job or reject and go for my interview with Amex in the afternoon, hoping that I'm selected. What's the 'best' thing? I was only given an hour to decide and I called my bf, friends and family for opinions- 50% commented accept and 50% reject. I was in a ULTIMATE STRUGGLE that I have no appetite to eat my breakfast. If I reject and go for Amex interview, I'm taking a risk on whether I will be selected for the job but the job obviously has better prospect. But at the same time, the other offer was so tempting cause I need not go through any interview and i can start work immediately. How many times did you get chances like this? After much struggle, I accepted the Hsbc job but I still want to go for the interview in the afternoon because I want to experience a formal interview.
HA, guess what. 1 hour before I head my way to kelly services, my agent called me that Amex has
filled up the position internally and the interview will be canceled. I was secretly happy that the interview was canceled.lol. I was thinking if I went for the interview and I was selected for the position, I will feel regretful to accept as bank officer. So, in the end I guess I made a right choice by accepting the job. Although is quite low paid, but I can gain 3 months of operations experience which is like better than nothing. If I didn't accept that job, I may end up searching for jobs for another 3 months which is a TORTURE to me. 2 months of job searching has driven me crazy and now I will work for 3 months before I go berserk again.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Has a sudden urge to blog today! ahaha I guess nobody visits my blog cause it has been dead for so long. lol. Lived a boring life now with no job, no fun activities etc thus I do not really feel like blogging. Seeing that is so dead, I shall update a bit then.
For the past 2 months after I came back from Taiwan, job seeking has been driving me crazy, i mean really crazy~ Initially I thought that job finding isn't that hard so I kind of take my own sweet time to find for the first week. BUT I was totally wrong, none of the agents get back to me after I sent several emails to them. I started to accept the fact that is super difficult to get into banking operations sector when you do not have any experience at all. Furthermore, I'm a Business degree student and not Banking and Finance, which makes it even harder for me to get in. My poor results make it even worse I guess. Up till now, I have not even gone for an interview. I start to wonder am I that undesirable that no banks want to interview me. I'm depressed for quite a long period of time. Though I kind of feel more positive now about job-seeking but I still not that optimistic about finding a job I like. Should I change and not be so insistent about getting a banking operation job because is very hard for me to get in or should I persist to work in banks? I'm really confused and I don't know what decision should I make? Though my parents aren't giving me any pressure at all, but I can't stop the stress in me.
I'm getting more and more pessimistic about finding a suitable job. Upon receiving my poor results on wed has finally make me break down to tears. Can a miracle happens and stop me from all these stress?
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Watched a movie with beebee ytd- Karate Kid. I've been wanting to watch this show for weeks and i keep pester him to watch with me but he always give me a silent reply and said ' doesn't look nice leh' -____- then ytd he asked me wanna watch Karate Kid cause his friends say very nice. AHBISH, at that moment i feel like punching him. LOL
Had prawning with half of the study gang at night and it was OMG BORING cause the frequency of catching a prawn is super ultra duper low. Last time we can easily catch 10+ prawns each lo, ytd 5 of us only caught 6 prawns!!! they never put in more prawns for us to catch la, and according to karl- the fishes are busy watching world cup underwater!
On the train back home, i saw this little Caucasian cute boy with his grandpa/father sitting beside me. His grandpa was teaching him words like 'station' - some people will go out of the train and some enter, then you will hear 'Beep beep sound' and the train will closed, the train will enter a tunnel. This little boy are so fascinated by the tunnel and he will just shout ' tunnel tunnel' and asked his grandpa if they are going to a tunnel again when the train closes. He even imitates the 'beep beep' sound when the door closed and said 'here we go to the tunnel again. OMG SO CUTE RIGHT? everyone around was entertained by this cute little boy!
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Finally my exams is over!!! i'm looking forward yet nervous to enter my next phase of life- work.
1) should i get a permanent job now but with low salary pay and hopefully they will raise my pay when i received my results or should i get a part time job now and look for a permanent job after i received my results?
2) what kind of job should i take? though i would like to take a finance job but after browsing the site, there isn't much finance entry jobs available. But there's a lot of sales and martketing job which i don't like. there's also a lot of high position jobs in finance which i cant apply! haiz, hopefully i can find a job that i like with good working environment and friendly colleagues but i know it may not be so smooth sailing compared to making friends in uni. there will be competitive colleagues and lots of politics. Though i have some working experience but all those are part time jobs- i can be the xiaomeimei and everyone will take care of me and teach me patiently. In real working environment, i can no longer be the xiaomeimei and i need to be independent and cope with all these politics.
3) i gonna sign up for driving test soon. yea finally i set my mind in learning driving after so long. Almost all my friends already had a driving license except me. actually, i'm afraid to take up driving after seeing so many car accidents but i know i need it in the future so gotta be brave gal!
Interesting 2010.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Saturday, May 01, 2010
Attention: is a boring post, just feel like blogging about how i feel. So if you are not bored, can skip it :))
Why do i always think so much? or maybe i should say THINK TOO MUCH?it is not the first time people telling me that i think too much, my family..my friends. 90% of those who are close to me say i think too much which i strongly agree. i tried to change but to no avail. i try to think less about certain things by thinking about other things but i just end up bothering about another thing. like omg??? this is so bad, although not to the extent that i'm pessimistic but i can worry about something for very very long. In the end, the matter may just end abruptly and peacefully, which means i actually do not need to worry so much. Maybe i just feel very insecure, maybe i just like things to go on smoothly. Sometimes things may not be so bad, but i may just think negatively and looks at everything in a unpleasant way. I'm always afraid about how others feel about me, i'm very sensitive and i'm worried if i have unintentionally hurt someone by words or actions. But i realised the more careful i am with all these, the less i communicate because i'm afraid. I hate myself for this. But i just cant break through this barrier and it seems like i will feel sad easily, especially at night when there's no one. This is such a bad sign. I just feel so helpless, why cant i be more confident of myself and care less about how others think of me? I should live my own life, to the fullest but apparently i'm not, i'm living to hope people have a good impression of me. I'm always never the extreme, never the wierd, never the unusual. i'm not picky for most of the things. i thought it was a good thing initially but i realised is not. it just means that i have no expectations. I don't know what cause me to be this way, it may be family background that i'm not rich so i do not have high expecations, simply contented with most of the things. I want a change, i tried to change but it seems like the more i try to change, the more unhappy i am. So i do not know.
I know is exams time, and i shouldn't be thinking about all these but feel exceptionally lonely tonight since my dad and mum are not home. so ya... happy mugging for those who are studying! :))
Saturday, May 01, 2010
Thursday, April 22, 2010
MUG + LACK OF SLEEP = Headache, giddy, nauseous, cough
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
In secondary school years, we will talk about how mean our teachers are because they just gave us LOADS n LOADS of homework to do, or gossip among our own cliques about OTHER cliques.
In jc, we talked about our eyecandies (where are they? will we get to see them today? AWW, so happy to see him la! etc etc)
Now what are we chatting about? CAREER! what are your career paths? Have you started applying jobs? What salary would you want? and so on... now if u asked me what i want in my life. say the truth, i don't really know. it seems to be changing every now and then. I do not mind a office job but it may just be doing all the mundane stuffs everyday. Perhaps would prefer operationalised kind? but i dun want to be in sales sector. but people are telling me that sales is the basic career for you to venture into other positions like management. SO I REALLY DUNNO. there's so many paths yet there's so many BUTs attached to each path. Currently, i have one little wish that i hope i could achieve in time before is too late is to earn more money so that i can bring my family for a holiday and bring them to eat good food every now and then. Sometimes i really hope that i can be successful in career and balance my family life as well cause i really love spending time with them. and also more money means i can buy alot of things that i want. hmm, so if u ask me what i want, i may just give u a superficial answer- earn lots of money. even better still, i hope i will like my job/jobs. Maybe u will say that i have such a childish thinking-earn alot of money yet dunno what i want in life. actually i do know what kind of paths i may take up but just that i cant make a decision now. Eventually i will find the job that suits me best next time as i venture into the work society. Everything is too early to say now, isnt it? i feel that i will find my way and have a path that is suited for me in the end. Expect the unexpected as i always say. because we haven't see the world yet or maybe i haven't.
deep down... wo bu xiang zhan da...
Friday, April 16, 2010
Saturday, April 10, 2010
NEWS!!!
On 10 April 2010, Human Joey Cheong has transformed into Robot Joey- serial number 102688. The STUDY mode button is switched on and Joey Robot has been activated. It will only be deactivated after 1pm on 27 May. If this robot go berserk during this period, please forgive it because the machine has malfunctioned but don't worry it will be repaired within 24 hours. However, if Robot Joey has accidentally gone into SLACK mode, please scold it to activate the STUDY mode again. Thank you for your cooperation.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Sunday, March 28, 2010
GREAT! I NEVER STUDY FOR THE WHOLE OF WEEKEND, i think i can go and bang wall le. OMG, i really should feel terribly guilty about not studying and should start mugging HARD! but there's simply so many things coming this 2 weeks... talks to attend , lectures and 1 yr anniversary with beebee!
i told him that i gonna blog about him, YES! BLOG ABOUT HIM. Have you seen a human-pig? not about size but those that can SLEEP ANYTIME ANYWHERE ANY SITUATIONS!I met one, his name is called ivan tan! i've experienced once when he just FELL ASLEEP while i was talking about emotional stuffs( i'm very sad at that moment). Suddenly, i heard no voice and i just "hello! hello! hello!", a faint voice replied...hellloooooo. he damn smart, he fell asleep but he lied to me and said" sorry, i was thinkng about something" so initially i thought he is really PONDERING... till the second time happened. Once again, no reply while i was talking on the phone and this time i start to suspect if he was sleeping and he FINALLY ADMITTED, he also admitted that he fell asleep the previous time.
From then on, i know that i have a piggy boyfriend, dunno whether to laugh or cry. Laugh cause he can just fell asleep so easily like nobody's business and cry cause he also can fell asleep even though we just quarrelled! OMG RIGHT? if we quarrel at night, his theory now is...SLEEP FIRST, tmr then coax gf! OMG OMG OMG, feel like killing him U KNOW!
ivan tan, i really warn you lo.... ONE DAY ONE DAY, I MAY BE SUPER MAD AT YOU AND B-U cause U SLEEP TOO MUCH AND IGNORE ME! omg.... why like that???? tian ah!!!!!
Sunday, March 28, 2010